my idea for a new sign in P1

Please Do Not Speak to the Consultant

The Kiosk is a touchscreen
That means, the buttons you see on the screen can be activated by touching it...
... with your fingers

If it looks like a button...
... then it probably is. You should press it.

Check-out means you are taking the laptop
Check-in means you are returning the laptop
No, it is not backwards.
If you are still having trouble distingushing the two, you are hereby banned from checking out a laptop

How do you renew a laptop?
Try pressing the button that says renew laptop.

The 20-min grace period is not for last minute facebook checks
If your ass walks in 15 minutes after closing and you're not sweating bullets, I'm not checking it in until it's one minute after the grace period.

No, I do not need to see your BruinCard

No, that's my mouse. Again, touchscreen.

No, you can not keep the laptop overnight

No, this room does not smell like pot

Please Do Not Speak to the Consultant